Yes, Women Masturbate

Wasn’t it Madonna who finally revealed to the world that, “yes, women masturbate”? It has always been accepted that boys and men did it, but it took a long, long time for it to become accepted practice among girls and women. Master’s and Johnson did research back in the 1950’s that revealed masturbation was common among women back then, way before Madonna, but women have still remained inhibited in this area of their sexuality.

Some of you are probably thinking “Geezz, Dr. Boyd what’s up with this subject today?” Well, let me tell you, there is an important reason I want to talk about this today. You see, my menopausal patients are always inquiring about all the normal changes we have come to know and expect during this time of our lives - but the most concerning to many of them is lack of both sexual desire and sensation in the genital area.

I hear the same thing week after week, and it’s heart breaking.

Hypoactive Sexual Desire Disorder (HSDD), can be present at any age but is most common during menopause. This lack of sexual desire can cause distress and have an extremely negative impact on personal, intimate relationships, which in turn affect the quality of life of the woman and her general health. But it is not only the lack of sexual desire that comes from the accompanying hormone losses, it is the lack of genital sensitivity and inability to have an orgasm that is most troubling to many of them.

It is at this point that we have to look at the whole picture. It is frustrating and scary to think that your body is giving up or just shutting off because of menopause, and many women just give up as their desire diminishes. It is important to see your doctor and have a complete physical to check for diabetes, thyroid disorders and coronary artery diseases. This is not a time to give up as intimacy is such an important part of your relationship with your partner and many couples remain sexually active well into their 80s & 90s.

This is where Madonna steps in, because the best treatment is self-help, and women need to share and be open about their experience with masturbation. Masturbation has been used for many years to help women understand their own bodies and how they function. It is no wonder many women are not satisfied sexually. How can that be? We cannot expect him to know what will turn us on & give us an orgasm if we do not know ourselves. Certainly you cannot just lie there and expect that he knows where to touch you, because he will touch you where he wants to and it may not be what you need to climax even if it feels good. Most men do not have a clue what to do and are secretly hoping we will just take the initiative and show them - instead of hoping that they will accidentally push the right buttons.

It’s really helpful to use a vibrator as they can restore orgasm to a woman who has not had one for many years or help a woman who has never experienced one (anorgasmic). Vibrators can also bring back sensitivity and accelerate the time to orgasm. Vibrators have already been successful in treating women who suffer from different types of vulvar pain that can be common in menopause due to loss of hormone support. Masturbation is something that is usually done privately, however many couples enjoy sharing the experience, in order to learn what their partner likes and what it takes for their partner to reach climax.

Menopause is a challenging time but, in all the studies that are done, the most important factor for a woman to have a fulfilling, loving sex life is that she trusts and feels comfortable with her partner. All the other challenges of menopause come in a distant second.

So grab you partners and start enjoying together and see what new things come of it.